When your job hinges on how well you talk to people, you learn a lot about how to have conversations — and that most of us don't converse very well. Celeste Headlee has worked as a radio host for decades, and she knows the ingredients of a great conversation: Honesty, brevity, clarity and a healthy amount of listening. In this insightful talk, she shares 10 useful rules for having better conversations. "Go out, talk to people, listen to people," she says. "And, most importantly, be prepared to be amazed."
TEDTalks is a daily video podcast of the best talks and performances from the TED Conference, where the world's leading thinkers and doers give the talk of their lives in 18 minutes (or less). Look for talks on Technology, Entertainment and Design -- plus science, business, global issues, the arts and much more.
Find closed captions and translated subtitles in many languages at http://www.ted.com/translate
Follow TED news on Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/tednews
Like TED on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/TED
Subscribe to our channel: http://www.youtube.com/user/TEDtalksDirector
I just wanted to say that I've watched this video over a year ago, and I don't think I've thanked you for the things you've said here. I really believe that this video has helped me change as a person for the better. Entering any kind of discussion while being open to the possibility that I might be wrong has improved my quality of life in a huge manner. I always recommend this to a lot of ppl, but, unfortunately and ironicaly, they usually don't "listen".
Aaron say's check it out http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NnnjR6y-QNk … now TALK about grooming Aaron say's U 2 can go to court, report being and alway's IT"S easy to embrace, hate rage and TURN ON everything you KNOW God Oprah I struggle with LOVE, POWER and MYSELF
It used to be that therapists would advise families to take the TV out out of the house so that the members could start conversing (and their family issues would naturally disipate). The same advice needs to be given to parents. To the parents. To the parents! Stop blaming the young people. Advice: Get parents to put away their phones and make (make, make, make) their kids put away their phones, video games, ipads. It’s that simple. From this, people will start to engage in conversation naturally, effortlessly, and interestedly. They will WANT to listen.
have eye contact with a person if you want to 'get down' to real communication...and nod to show interest is a good idea...to can 'eye contact' and 'nodding' or showing you are listening is good...'why show you are listening if, in fact, you are listening?'....because you are being considerate of the person letting them know you are paying attention to them...if you try talking to me without eye contact or don't show you are into what i'm saying then i walk away...she mentions more than once 'i talk to bla bla...i talk to bla bla'...i don't think she talks 'with' but she talks 'to' and she talks 'at'....she's talking 'at' this whole spiel.....
you're never disappointed because you guyz only host interesting people. I mean They must have something if they've been invited to the show. Try to host regular people and you might not be that excited. Just A perspective
SALEM \ PEACE \ HEY
(Then He proportioned him and breathed into him from His [created] soul and made for you hearing and vision and hearts; little are you grateful.) 9 ASJDHA : THE PROSTRATION \ QURAN.
(Say, "It is He who has produced you and made for you hearing and vision and hearts; little are you grateful.) 67 AL-MULK \ THE SOVERELGNTY \ QURAN EL-KARIM
( And do not pursue that of which you have no knowledge. Indeed, the hearing, the sight and the heart - about all those [one] will be questioned ) 17 AL-ISRAA \ THE NIGHT JOURNEY\ QURAN
YOUR BROTHER FROM ALGERIA. <3
Just a minor point, but I don’t think that we should be conditioning our conversations on trying to make sure that we’re not offending anyone. If they’re offended by anything, quite honestly, I believe they should just suck it up.
The world is an offensive place, and we’re not going to advance as a society and culture trying to make it less so.
It would probably be better for that to be a consequence of ACTUAL ways to improve society, such as better conversation, better schooling (that would hopefully have better conversations pinned under it), and other things.
Edit: I also disagree with the sentiment that you simply shouldn’t bring up an experience of yours that’s analogous with theirs because they’re, quote, “never the same”. Of course they’re not going to be the same, the point of bringing up an analogous situation is to compare and contrast and make any logical deductions you can from them.
I don’t know what sorts of conversations you’re having, but I never bring up an analogous situation to prove something about myself, or to make it about myself, period. I do it to draw from that experience to offer some kind of advice, helpful or not, and if I know that that advice isn’t going to be a slam-dunk, which, admittedly, is the case most of the time, I’ll acknowledge that fact, but that shouldn’t serve as grounds to not bring up the analogous situation at all or draw from it if possible.
Edit 2: 8:07 “It is not about you.” 8:59 “What they care about is you.”
So which is it?? Is or isn’t the conversation about me? Or is it just the case that we should treat the situation as if all parties in a discussion are equally important?
I’m not sure why, this little contradiction just irritated me a little bit. And quite honestly, I could slightly be misunderstanding what the difference here is, if there is one.
If there isn’t one though, then be more consistent.
#7 Try not to repeat yourself and early she said don't repeat back what the person said to you. I am curious when a person gives you verbal instructions it's meant to be remembered otherwise they would have wrote it down. Since its verbal instructions how not summarize and repeat the instructions back to the person in order for them not to endless repeat what the same instructions over again?
I do not have conversations anymore because most of the people I encounter just want to talk, not to listen. If I followed her advise, would it be better? No. She is assuming people want to engage when in reality, again, the only thing they want to do is talk and be right.
Also, "forget the details". What a shallow way to have a conversation.
Great talk. The most annoying thing people do is listen to you describe an experience you had that was important to you, and they immediately reply with a similar experience they had, rendering your experience unimportant because they have turned the attention to themselves. Stop doing that.
Is she aware of today's society? People are mostly full of crap and there is pretty much nothing amazing about most people. Imagine coming across a hardcore Trump supporter and you try to keep your mouth shut and listen to a load of bullshit. Keeping it short clean interesting bla bla.. i get all that and it makes sense. But that part about waiting to be amazed and not getting dissapointed ever? That is just plain bullshit.
Some of the best conversations I’ve ever had were complete gibberish with my friends, but we listened to each other, and we cared what the other one had to say. There’s no better feeling than knowing the person you’re talking to doesn’t want to just respond to what your saying, but actually wants to have a real conversation, even when it’s nonsense.
#6 I can hardly say anything to a friend who doesn’t come back with how she, feels or her experiences about what I just said. How can I get her to stop that. I hardly ever get to fully express myself, the topic always goes back to her and I end up asking her questions about her experience just to keep the conversation going.
I seem to be her only friend, she has no family and lives up in the mountains. I try to keep this in mind when she does this, but I also think if she became aware of it she would be mindful and stop this habit. 😊
I appriciate your presentation a lot. But it's hard to put it in practice when I'm stuck 24 7 with the same group of people between my job and home. Every one becomes so predictable. I know exactly how they are going to react about every possible subject. And yes they wanna tell me about ALL their big fat problems but they won't listen to mine. I know when they're lying .. I know when they are deceitful ... So I started to shut myself from everyone. I read more, I use the Internet more and am happy about it
All I can say this is silly. None of this is necessary. Adults sitting around watching someone tell them how and what to do, say, and act during a conversation. Come on people, use your imagination! You don't need this over educated person, rather full of herself telling you how to converse via a formula.. Live and learn. Teach yourself. Just have something interesting to say. Please.
Number 11: Don't look at someone/an object/a scene over the speaker while they are talking/looking directly at you. You don't have to maintain direct eye-contact, but there is nothing ruder than tuning out for a moment while the other is talking, and looking directly at you.
Be sure to check out her talk at Savannah Book Fest this year on c-span.org BookTV. She cites the academic studies supporting her theses, and adds more info re: the length of people’s attention spans when listening.
I'm an introvert. I don't like talking to others even meet them.May be I'm so insane but i can't control myself. I usually stay at home, surf web to watch shows, films, learn chinese. i really feel to hate myself because of the lack of confidence and bravery. How should I change my timidity?
...... I think practicing writing comment is the useful way to improve english! The above sentences are true about myself.
Don't pontificate is right! I hate being lectured. Bill Nye - same advice as Dale Carnegie. - Some conversations wander all over the place to the point that by the time you think of something to say they've changed the subject. Some people are bad about repeating themselves, saying everything twice. Many group conversations are wrecked because someone can't stop talking.
Задайте и вы свой вопрос, это бесплатно!
Адвокат по телефону получит предварительную информацию от вас, после чего может в спокойной обстановке восполнить возможные пробелы и проанализировать
правовые нормы. Он оценит все факты и сможет подготовить развернутую консультацию для вас. По этой причине адвокат является вашим сторонником в
разрешении возникших проблем. Вы сбережете свои средства, обратившись за телефонной консультацией.
Таким образом, обращаясь по телефону к услугам адвоката, вы получаете возможность решить возникшие проблемы с минимальными финансовыми и временными
затратами. В некоторых случаях в дальнейших очных консультациях не возникает необходимости. По этой причине помощь адвоката, оказываемая по телефону,
Мы готовы предложить долговременное абонентское юридическое обслуживание на договорной основе. В состав комплексногоправового сопровождения деятельности организации входит юридическая помощь юридические услуги по всем правовым вопросам, которые могут возникнуть в процессе текущей деятельности. В основе данной услуги лежат принципы аутсорсинга, благодаря чему можно избежать юридических и финансовых рисков. Человек без юридического образования, зачастую, не знает своих прав и не знаком с нюансами законодательства. Поэтому он не может выстроить и четко продумать тактику и стратегию своих действий. Непрофессиональный подход к решению юридических вопросов приводит к плачевным последствиям, вплоть до уголовной ответственности.
Так на практике нередко можно столкнуться с ситуацией, когда водитель виновник ДТП не обратившись за своевременной юридической помощью в ДТП, получает реальное уголовное наказание, которого можно было бы избежать, если бы к делу подключился опытный адвокат по ДТП.
Случались ли у Вас или Ваших близких подобные ситуации? Лучше конечно, чтобы никогда не случались!
и других законов,
сделает анализ практики судов по спорным ситуациям. Наши консультации по телефону и без регистрации пояснят нормы закона и порядок действий
для решения спора.
Консультация юриста включает в себя разъяснения Ваших прав и обязанностей, правовой анализ возникшей ситуации и отношений, прогноз перспектив разрешения имеющихся вопросов, выработка наиболее эффективной тактики и стратегии юридической защиты интересов, предоставление полной и достоверной информации по волнующим правовым вопросам, в частности: о состоянии конкретного дела, о содержании и значении документа, о правовых последствиях определенных действий клиента или третьих лиц, о перспективах развития спора, о возможных мерах защиты нарушенного права и т.п.
Юридическая консультация может быть первичной (предоставляется Клиенту при первом его обращении к адвокату) или вторичной (систематически предоставляется адвокатом Клиенту в процессе ведения его дела и представления его интересов).